Being a Catholic himself, Stephen Colbert is able to break down for the layperson (read: godless liberal) the Vatican’s stance on contraception, which recently became a hot-button (read: wedge) issue for Campaign 2012.

It goes a little like this: First, as Colbert mentions in this clip from Tuesday night’s episode of “The Colbert Report,” the kind of sex the church condones — between married straights — “is the mystical union of two people inspired to create new physical life.” Fine, nothing new there.

Also, it’s a “divine and ineffably beautiful three-way.” Wait, what?

It gets more colorful from there, but we’ll let Colbert explain the rest in this video, as this is a classy family publication. –KA

Colbert Nation:

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