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Bush Considering Exit Strategy for War on Obesity
Mar 4, 2006 According to the strategy being mulled, President Bush would simply declare victory over obesity and announce a plan to withdraw most low-carb products from supermarket shelves by the end of 2006. (satire)Bush Considering Exit Strategy for War on Obesity
Mar 4, 2006 According to the strategy being mulled, President Bush would simply declare victory over obesity and announce a plan to withdraw most low-carb products from supermarket shelves by the end of 2006. (satire)Armed Cheney to Guard Ports
Feb 25, 2006 Attempting to defuse the controversy over the decision to place the operation of several key American ports in the hands of a company based in Dubai, Vice President Dick Cheney said today that he would personally patrol those ports with a 28-gauge shotgun.Halliburton Wins Contract to Reconstruct Cheney’s Reputation
Feb 18, 2006 The $42-billion contract represents the first time that the company has been employed to put its reconstruction expertise to work on one embattled human being. (satire)An Olympic Athlete With No Tragic History? That Won’t Do!
Feb 12, 2006 A member of the U.S. Olympic ski team was disqualified from competition today when it was learned that he did not have a sufficiently compelling human storyline to exploit on the NBC telecast of the worldwide sporting event. (satire)Groundhog Day at the White House
Feb 5, 2006 Cheney's Brief Appearance, Return to Secure Location May Mean Six More Weeks of Winter