Finally, Some Overdue Attention to the Pancake Crisis

The highly pressing matter of H.R. 323, otherwise known as the “IHOPs Should Stay Open All Night So We Can Get Some Pancakes Act,” may be a figment of The Onion writing staff’s twisted satirical imagination, but we can’t say for sure that ideas like this haven’t occurred to our friends in Congress. –KA

The Onion News Network:

Congressmen Submit Emergency 3 AM Bill Demanding IHOP Stay Open All Night