The highly pressing matter of H.R. 323, otherwise known as the “IHOPs Should Stay Open All Night So We Can Get Some Pancakes Act,” may be a figment of The Onion writing staff’s twisted satirical imagination, but we can’t say for sure that ideas like this haven’t occurred to our friends in Congress. –KA

The Onion News Network:


Congressmen Submit Emergency 3 AM Bill Demanding IHOP Stay Open All Night

WAIT BEFORE YOU GO...

This year, the ground feels uncertain — facts are buried and those in power are working to keep them hidden. Now more than ever, independent journalism must go beneath the surface.

At Truthdig, we don’t just report what's happening — we investigate how and why. We follow the threads others leave behind and uncover the forces shaping our future.

Your tax-deductible donation fuels journalism that asks harder questions and digs where others won’t.

Don’t settle for surface-level coverage.

Unearth what matters. Help dig deeper.

Donate now.

SUPPORT TRUTHDIG