Ahmadinejad Promises Democratic Reforms in Egypt
"Your call for democratic freedoms has been heard loud and clear," Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad told the protesters. "And soon, they will be instituted in Egypt, where you can visit them."Fake news by Andy Borowitz
TEHRAN — In a dramatic address to pro-democracy protesters in Tehran, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad promised the people of Iran that there would soon be democratic reforms in Egypt.
“Your call for democratic freedoms has been heard loud and clear,” Ahmadinejad told the protesters. “And soon, they will be instituted in Egypt, where you can visit them.” He said that every Iranian who thirsts for democracy “should rejoice at it blossoming such a short plane ride away.”
In an effort to cater to the social-media habits of Iran’s youth, Ahmadinejad said that the Iranian government would soon establish a Facebook page for democracy and permit the protesters to click on “Like.”
The Iranian president said that democracy in nearby Egypt plus a democracy-themed Facebook page show that the Iranian government is “bending over backward” to listen to its people. “I know that you want democracy,” he told the crowd. “But for the time being, you’ll just have to settle for hypocrisy.”
Elsewhere, democracy continued to sweep every Middle Eastern country that George W. Bush did not invade.
Award-winning humorist, television personality and film actor Andy Borowitz is author of the book “The Republican Playbook.”
© 2011 CREATORS SYNDICATE
Wait, before you go…If you're reading this, you probably already know that non-profit, independent journalism is under threat worldwide. Independent news sites are overshadowed by larger heavily funded mainstream media that inundate us with hype and noise that barely scratch the surface. We believe that our readers deserve to know the full story. Truthdig writers bravely dig beneath the headlines to give you thought-provoking, investigative reporting and analysis that tells you what’s really happening and who’s rolling up their sleeves to do something about it.
Like you, we believe a well-informed public that doesn’t have blind faith in the status quo can help change the world. Your contribution of as little as $5 monthly or $35 annually will make you a groundbreaking member and lays the foundation of our work.
Support Truthdig
Opinion
Reviving the 2010 reform process could be key to resolving Pakistan’s continued crises, but reforms must target the military's massive business empire.
Our founding principles have been visibly eroding since the beginning of this century, but 2020 seems to be finishing them off.
Roslyn Fuller's new book explains how to rescue our government from oligarchy.
While it celebrates Hong Kong's protesters as champions of democracy, our political press paints our own as vandals, thugs and criminals.
Impeachment is an important historical moment — but we must look past it to create the possibility of real change.
A new University of Cambridge study finds widespread dissatisfaction with America's political system has unleashed a wave of self-doubt.
There are currently no responses to this article.
Be the first to respond.