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By Bill Boyarsky $17.79
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As allegations of sexual abuse by Catholic clergy members continue to challenge the church, the Vatican, according to a visibly agitated Jon Stewart, has failed to respond appropriately, instead adopting a victim stance with the Western media as its persecutor. Quick—cue the kitten footage!
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 bbc.co.uk
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Note to the Vatican: Adopting the mantle of victimhood in the face of accusations of sexual abuse by clergy members and attempted cover-ups by other church officials is not bound to go over very well with the public—especially if parallels are drawn to the persecution of the Jews.
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 AP / Silvia Izquierdo
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On Thursday, the Vatican’s top legal official pointed out that Pope Benedict XVI won’t be implicated in any of the sex abuse cases currently under investigation, as he is technically a head of state. Also, the Vatican would like The New York Times to “reconsider its attack mode” regarding the pope.
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It’s no secret that Christopher Hitchens isn’t big on religion, but above and beyond his disdain of deity worship, he’s got some serious issues with the Catholic Church’s handling of both the child abuse claims made against clergy members ... (continued)
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By E.J. Dionne, Jr. — As the church rightly teaches, acknowledging the true nature of our sin is the one and only path to redemption and forgiveness.
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By William Pfaff — I would think one judgment history will make on the Catholic Church’s Second Vatican Council (1962-65), under Pope John XXIII and Pope Paul VI, will be a reproach for its failure to lift the rule of celibacy for secular priests.
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 AP / Gerald Herbert
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Pope Benedict XVI’s official investigators at the Vatican have been inundated with claims of abuse by Catholic priests and nuns, all to be handled by a small team of 10 at the Holy See’s in-house operation. To offset some of the public discontent, the pope is writing ... (continued)
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 Wikimedia Commons
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It would make sense that the Vatican would have an official head exorcist, and indeed it does. He’s 85-year-old Father Gabriele Amorth, and after wrangling many an unclean spirit in his time, he now has a book out with the catchy title “Memoirs of an Exorcist” and thinks he’s seen you-know-who in the details of recent sex scandals in the Holy See.
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 Flickr / roblisameehan
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The long-running clergy sexual abuse scandal within Dublin’s Archdiocese is still the Catholic Church’s problem, and on Monday, Pope Benedict XVI met with Irish bishops for the first part of a two-day strategy and damage-control session at the Vatican.
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 youtube.com
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It’s kind of sweetly dorky, like your grandpa finally figuring out how to use his iPod or something, but the Vatican has apparently discovered the late hip-hop icon Tupac Shakur and has gone so far as to include one of his songs, “Changes,” among a lineup of eight tunes on “The Vatican’s Playlist” (which has its own MySpace page!).
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 Flickr / el fedora
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The Vatican used to burn people for talking about aliens. Now it holds conferences on the subject. After presiding over such an affair, the director of the Vatican Observatory explained “we cannot put limits on God’s creative freedom.” (continued)
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 orbiscatholicus.com
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An Italian mom’s wish for her kids to have a secular education provided the catalyst for a ruling by the European Court of Human Rights to bar crucifixes from being displayed in Italy’s classrooms. Needless to say, the court’s decision didn’t sit well with the Vatican.
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 Wikimedia Commons / marxists.org
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Although Pope Benedict XVI made a point of denouncing institutionalized Marxism two years ago, the Vatican’s own newspaper, L’Osservatore Romano, last week cast a more redemptive light on Karl Marx’s ideas by going to the primary source and validating the German economist’s critiques of capitalism.
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 AP / Gerald Herbert
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It’s been nearly 500 years since King Henry VIII split with the Vatican and formed the Church of England, and now Pope Benedict XVI has given Anglicans a way to come back to the Catholic fold while keeping some of their own traditions.
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 Wikimedia Commons/Agência Brasil
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Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi is aiming to do some serious image rehab after taking a beating in the European press this summer for his alleged sexual indiscretions. To that end, Berlusconi is pulling out the legal big guns and going after publications in France, Italy, Spain and Britain for besmirching his reputation.
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 thawstudio.com
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In the face of strong conservative Catholic opposition, Italy has approved use of the RU486 abortion drug. Italian authorities decided to allow the drug to be administered by a doctor up to the seventh week of pregnancy.
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 AP photo / Philippe Wojazer, pool
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By E.J. Dionne, Jr. — When Obama meets with Benedict XVI on Friday, there will be no right-wing Catholic demonstrators upbraiding the pontiff for conferring the church’s legitimacy upon this liberal politician. In fact, when it comes to economics, this conservative pope is to the left of the president.
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 highvolumemedia.com
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In the spirit of the poignant critiques of capitalism made popular by Pope John Paul II, Pope Benedict XVI has written a scathing letter just in time for the capitalist G-8 economic summit in Italy that demands we find a “profoundly new way of understanding business enterprise.”
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 AP photo / David Silverman, pool
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It was just the second day of his Holy Land Tour 2009, but unsurprisingly, the presence of Pope Benedict XVI in Israel stirred up more static on Tuesday—this time over his personal wartime history.
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 iwatchstuff.com
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It wasn’t exactly “two thumbs up” material, but despite the Vatican’s vested interest in pooh-poohing certain conspiratorial notions presented in “Da Vinci Code” author Dan Brown’s oeuvre, the official paper of the Holy See didn’t quite pan director Ron Howard’s cinematic treatment of Brown’s prequel, “Angels & Demons,” either.
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 UND / Ben Franske
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By E.J. Dionne, Jr. — You have heard the expression “more Catholic than the pope.” We now know that the reaction of right-wing Catholics to Notre Dame’s invitation to President Obama falls into this category.
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 Wikimedia Commons/Fabio Pozzebom/ABr
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Pope Benedict XVI is heading for Jerusalem soon as part of his tour of the Holy Land, and although he occupies the same vaunted position as his predecessor, Pope John Paul II, Pope Benedict’s own history, along with that of the church, carries a charge that could present challenges during his visit.
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 highvolumemedia.com
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The Vatican is about to become a more Web-savvy institution, according to Benedict XVI. The pope issued a public statement Friday acknowledging that the Holy See failed to investigate the background of Holocaust-denying British Bishop Richard Williamson before formally welcoming him back into the Church’s good graces in January.
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 youtube.com
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With a media-dubbed moniker that doesn’t look good for either party, the “Holocaust Bishop”—a British bishop recently un-excommunicated by the pope—is being told by the Vatican to recant his views after news broke that he “believe[s] there were no gas chambers [during World War II].”
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The Central Council of Jews in Germany has come to an impasse with the Roman Catholic Church after Pope Benedict XVI reintegrated four bishops into the Vatican’s fold, including British cleric Richard Williamson, who has taken a revisionist stance on the Holocaust in recent public statements.
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 Flickr/roblisameehan
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Pope Benedict XVI on Monday called for the protection of traditional heterosexuality, comparing the Catholic church’s role in defending the family to saving the rain forests.
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 Flickr / Patrick Gruban
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The issue of gay rights was not just front-and-center on a national scale in news and politics this week; it was also a topic of concern for the United Nations General Assembly. Unfortunately, the U.S. didn’t exactly blaze the trail for civil rights in that arena either.
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 AP photo / Gerald Herbert
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Jokes about religion often play with the boundaries of tolerance and taste, but they don’t always carry the consequences that Sabina Guzzanti now faces. The Italian actress could go to jail for upsetting the powers that be with a satirical zinger about the pope and two gay devils.
Jokes about religion often play with the boundaries of tolerance and taste, but they don’t always carry the consequences that Sabina Guzzanti now faces. The Italian actress could go to jail for upsetting the powers that be with a satirical zinger about the pope and two gay devils.
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 iwatchstuff.com
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It would appear that the pope is not a Dan Brown fan. The Vatican has refused to allow star Tom Hanks and director Ron Howard to film scenes from author Brown’s “Da Vinci Code” prequel, “Angels and Demons,” on its holy territory.
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 excelsiorfile.blogspot.com
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The Virgin Mary is becoming a stage diva, and she’s counting Pope Benedict XVI as one of her biggest fans. A pope-endorsed musical, “Mary of Nazareth,” is about to debut at the Vatican’s own concert hall later this month. By definition, this’ll hardly be a racy production, but—bonus!—Alma Manera, the performer picked to play Jesus’ mother, was once a Miss Italia contestant!
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 nasa.gov
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The pope’s chief astronomer has written an article in the Vatican newspaper that argues that intelligent beings “created by God could exist in outer space.” The article, “Aliens Are My Brother,” is likely a move by the Vatican to strengthen its scientific credentials, bringing science and religion closer while maintaining papal control over the entire universe.
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By E.J. Dionne, Jr. — The pope came to the U.S. as a quiet but forceful critic of “an increasingly secular and materialistic culture.” Almost any American who paid attention to his sermon Thursday had to be uncomfortable because all of us are shaped by the very forces he was criticizing.
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 AP photo / Gregorio Borgia
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The pope is set to land Tuesday for a whirlwind visit to America, his first since assuming the mantle of the Roman Catholic Church. A spokesman has indicated that Benedict XVI will address the church’s sex abuse scandal, a topic around which protests are expected.
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The “Real Time” host uses the recent raid on a polygamist compound to point a finger at the Vatican, which he calls “the Bear Sterns of organized pedophilia—too big to fail.” This wasn’t one of Maher’s more applauded closing numbers, but it’s not one you should miss.
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 philadelphiaweekly.com
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During his midnight Christmas mass at the Vatican on Tuesday, Pope Benedict XVI paid special attention to what he called the “ill-treated world” and our “selfish and reckless exploitation” of energy. He’s not just all talk: it turns out the Vatican bought carbon credits this holiday season to offset emissions. It’s just a little present to the world from the biggest little city in Italy.
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 timesonline.typepad.com
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No offense to those Catholics who were heartened by the prospect of Pope John Paul II’s image appearing in a commemorative bonfire in Poland last April, but the UK’s Times Online has helpfully offered some other possibilities as to who else, besides the departed pontiff, may have materialized in that mystical blaze.
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 catholic-heritage.net
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At a gathering in southern Poland to mark the second anniversary of Pope John Paul II’s death on April 2, 2005, one Gregorz Lukasik took pictures of the commemorative bonfire lit at the memorial and found a striking image when he saw the photos after the event.
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Given the Catholic Church’s record of dealing (or not) with homosexuality, especially within its upper ranks, it’s not particularly shocking that the Vatican suspended Monsignor Tomasso Stenico after he said he was gay on an Italian television show.
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 boston.com
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Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice may be persona non grata at the Vatican. When Rice swung through Italy in August, she gave notice ahead of time about her hopes to meet with Pope Benedict XVI, but the pontiff’s camp politely rebuffed her request, explaining that he was on holiday.
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Visitors to the White House are now affronted with a new kind of conservatism: a dress code. Facing stricter guidelines than at the Vatican, tour seekers are now subject to the following rules: no jeans, sneakers, shorts, mini-skirts, T-shirts and tank tops and, especially, no flip-flops.
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 AP Photo / Luca Bruno
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In a move that strikes some as proprietary ecclesiastical politics, the Vatican released a statement Tuesday claiming that the Catholic Church is the only Christian organization eligible to use the term church to describe itself.
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 theponderingamerican.blogspot.com
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The Vatican has come up with “Ten Commandments” for drivers, warning that cars can be “an occasion of sin.” The document recommends prayer for surviving the road in good physical and spiritual condition, especially saying the rosary while driving because its “rhythm and gentle repetition does not distract the driver’s attention.”
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The Vatican is urging Catholics not to donate to Amnesty International because, it says, the group selectively promotes abortion. The human rights organization says the church has misrepresented its policy and, in the process, imperiled human rights. The World Health Organization estimates that 70,000 women die every year from unsafe abortions.
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Days after California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger expressed concerns over the proposed (but unfunded) 700-mile fence along the U.S.-Mexico border, a high-ranking representative of the pope called the measure part of an “inhuman program.”
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 timesunion.com
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The pope’s recent comments signal a divergence from the religious outreach of his predecessor, John Paul II, who was the first pope to enter a mosque. Benedict XVI has since apologized for his speech, which quoted a Byzantine emperor who said the prophet Muhammad had brought only “evil and inhuman” things to the world.
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In a newly released report, the Vatican described same-sex marriages as an “eclipse of God,” and said that feminism “reinforced the individualistic image of man and woman” and in doing so was “surpassing the family.”
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Father Marcial Maciel Degollado, 86, is the most prominent priest yet to be disciplined for allegedly molesting young members of the Church. But because of his advanced age, he’s getting only a slap on the wrist—a demand that he give up his ministry in favor of a quiet life of “prayer and penitence.”
Assuming the allegations are true, good riddance.
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