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By Carl Safina
$15.55
By Joan Blades and Kristin Rowe-Finkbeiner
$8.97
$40
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Note: That headline was not intended to be a factual statement. Rather, it mimics a curious strategy used by Sen. Jon Kyl when he vastly overstated the percentage of Planned Parenthood’s budget that goes to providing abortions.
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Angry Wisconsin liberals are using the state’s Supreme Court election as a referendum on Gov. Scott Walker and taking aim at expletive-flinging Justice David Prosser. Will this justice be served?
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Always in deft command of the many nuances of international relations, Stephen Colbert suggests, in this clip from Tuesday’s “Colbert Report,” that Italy’s beleaguered Berlusconi ought to take his bunga-bunga show on the road ... to Egypt.
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In case you hadn’t noticed, the Republicans have taken over the House, and they’re ready to make some big changes and help everyday Americans by ... focusing on ousting Obama and extending certain extant tax cuts. Oh.
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Fake news by Andy Borowitz —
Canadian immigration officials have reported a huge increase in the number of requests for Canadian citizenship in the past 24 hours, with more than 55 million such inquiries pouring in since late Tuesday night.
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YouTube
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By Mr. Fish — Political comedy, without practical application within a political strategy, will merely satiate our hunger for real change with a punch line and rob us of our sensitivity to any number of social and political injustices.
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For y’all who couldn’t make it to Washington, D.C., and don’t subscribe to cable, Comedy Central’s website has provided a live video stream of the Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear. Enjoy.
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By Eugene Robinson — With their “Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear” this weekend, political satirists Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert are late to the party. This weird campaign has been Comedy Central all along.
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Thanks to the Supreme Court’s recent ruling in Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission, corporations can go crazy with campaign funding (oh, and they are) without even having to make it clear where their money goes. This is the democracy of the future!
Posted on Oct 27, 2010
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It’s hard to believe that the tea party movement is less than 2 years old. Just think of the cast of colorful characters we’ve gotten to know in such a short time—from old favorites repurposed for the job like Glenn Beck, Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann to newcomers like Christine O’Donnell. Stephen Colbert relives the magic in this special “Colbert Report” mash-up.
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On Tuesday, Stephen Colbert joined fellow guest Maria Shriver on the deceptively comfy couch frequently inhabited by Barbara Walters and her colleagues from “The View” to discuss his upcoming fear-based rally and Bill O’Reilly before things got a little too uncomfortable.
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Two surprise guests dropped by “The Daily Show” on Thursday. First came Stephen Colbert, whose apparent failure to score a permit will lead to a hybrid “Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear” on Oct. 30. And then Oprah Winfrey crashed the show to announce that she’s picking up the tab to send the studio audience to the Washington rally.
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Is Islam finding its way into our schools? Christmas carols? How about our soup? Stephen Colbert is on that case, just like everyone on Fox News, in this clip from Monday’s episode of “The Colbert Report.”
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Faced with the happy prospect of describing what one MSNBC reporter could not—the 41 combinations of sex that Americans are having, according to a new survey—Stephen Colbert breaks it down with the help of his articulated friends Not Barbie and Samwise Gamgee.
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Wikimedia Commons
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CNN has canned Rick Sanchez after the “Rick’s List” host unleashed a verbal barrage against Jon Stewart’s “bigotry,” Jews in the media, and the institutional racism he says he experienced in the newsroom. Guess what part of the rant the media is going to leave out?
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According to several media pundits and their talking points, President Obama is “on the ropes,” and there is a marked “enthusiasm gap” on the Democratic side of things as “apathy” strikes the left heading into the midterm elections.
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By Ruth Marcus — Stephen Colbert is no Elmo—which is why it was crazy for House Democrats to have him testify before a subcommittee last week about migrant labor.
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After spending a day as a migrant farmworker, farceur Stephen Colbert hit Congress to testify about his experience. Media outrage ensued, but as Firedoglake points out, Colbert has done more for the powerless in this instance than any of the “blow-dried idiots that sit around the White House press room.”
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With a wit unheard of on Capitol Hill, Stephen Colbert has taken his message of truthiness and testified in front of Congress on behalf of migrant farmworkers, citing his expertise on the matter after spending an entire day in the picking fields.
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cnn.com
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Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert have taken parody to the next level. The comedians announced two parallel rallies to happen on the mall in Washington, D.C., just days before the midterm elections.
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Vice President Joe Biden popped in on Stephen Colbert on Wednesday night for a special troop-boosting edition of “The Colbert Report,” where Biden gave a shout-out to a certain president who made a plan to pull U.S. forces out of Iraq.
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The Atlantic’s Jeffrey Goldberg stopped in at “The Colbert Report” on Tuesday to comment on the whole Iran-bombing hoopla that’s affecting certain world leaders lately (you know who you are), pronouncing that ... (continued)
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The midterm elections are approaching quickly, and that can mean only one thing: It’s time to once again crank up the speculation that President Obama is actually a Muslim.
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MSNBC’s Dylan Ratigan used to be on a show called “Fast Money” before he caught on that Wall Street’s big bankers were playing the people while they “paid themselves billions of dollars,” as he tells Stephen Colbert in this clip.
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So, conservative talk radio starlet Laura Ingraham showed up on “The Colbert Report” Tuesday night, despite the fact that the show’s host had once dubbed her “Ichabod Crane’s banshee widow,” to plug her new book, “The Obama Diaries.” How’d she do?
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Stephen Colbert’s a bit under the weather in this clip from Monday night’s “Colbert Report,” and it’s going to take a lot more than bunny slippers to make things better. Enter economics whiz Paul Krugman ... (continued)
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Rolling Stone’s It Boy Michael Hastings shows up in this clip from Monday’s “Colbert Report” to clarify that he didn’t have an explicit agenda to get Gen. Stanley McChrystal fired, even though that’s what ended up happening.
Posted on Jun 29, 2010
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That Rep. Joe Barton got himself into quite a jam last week when he apologized to BP for the White House “shakedown” of the megacorp, but, as Stephen Colbert puts it here, a Barton backlash was soon to follow. (continued)
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Leave it to Stephen Colbert to work in a joke about Tiger Woods this late in the game and still make it hit. Oh, and another one about violating sea turtles—how is that funny?
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Why isn’t Barack Obama appearing to be angry over the BP oil spill debacle? Stephen Colbert demonstrates how the president can bump up the anger a notch—and discovers why buying condoms at a BP station isn’t a very good idea.
Posted on Jun 8, 2010
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Stephen Colbert may tip his hat to Taiwanese electronics maker Foxconn for its creative and multipronged solutions to its employee suicide problems, but naughty Naomi Campbell and her dictator-grade diamonds ... (continued)
Posted on Jun 3, 2010
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Since conservative pundits are slacking in their duty of tearing apart Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan before she can clinch her lifetime position, Stephen Colbert is on hand to step in and grasp at straws, literally, in an effort to besmirch her sparkling reputation.
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Although Michael Bloomberg and various other media-friendly types made sure to share the same talking points about the recent New York City bomb scare being “amateurish” and “pathetic,” Stephen Colbert would like the alleged perpetrator to know that ... (continued)
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Stephen Colbert is outraged at the Obama administration’s attempt to thwart banks’ promotion of risky investments. After all, risky investments are like risky sex, and “if you make the banks wear a condom, they won’t be able to feel it when they’re f*&#ing us over.”
Posted on Apr 20, 2010
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After highly upsetting video footage, taken from a U.S. Apache helicopter, showing 12 Iraqi citizens being killed by American gunfire was posted on WikiLeaks, Stephen Colbert wonders how long it’ll be before the website’s proprietors can be tracked down by Predator drones.
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After calling Stephen Colbert the startling nickname of “Steyoncé,” the Rev. Al Sharpton hunkers down for a more serious discussion about his latest priority: education. “Education is a civil right,” Sharpton says, describing his project with Newt Gingrich (!) in this clip from Tuesday’s “Colbert Report.”
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Although he denies it in this clip from Thursday’s “Colbert Report,” David Frum is indeed a “conservative apostate.” What else can being fired from the American Enterprise Institute possibly mean? And what does all of this have to do with Scientology?
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Eliot Spitzer is attempting to work his way back into the public’s good graces, and the former New York governor braved “The Colbert Report” on Tuesday night, only to be roundly “condemned” by Stephen Colbert. However, Spitzer has a certain likability, Colbert admitted, which might have something to do with having nothing to hide anymore. (continued)
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In a rare moment of on-air candor, Stephen Colbert consults with Secretary of Health and Human Services Kathleen Sebelius about the situation in Haiti and learns a very important texting trick that viewers can use to send money, now, to add to the earthquake relief effort.
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So, this “Game Change” book is making waves in the political world, what with its tales of infighting and palace intrigue in both leading candidates’ camps during the 2008 election. Stephen Colbert takes a peek between the covers before interviewing one of the book’s authors, John Heilemann, about the veracity of his, and co-author Mark Halperin’s, claims in these clips.
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Thank goodness “The Colbert Report” is back on the air, and just in time to comment on the attempted airplane attack in Detroit on Christmas Day, which was nearly, er, pulled off by a new kind of dirty bomb. This, plus the prospect of full-body scanning in airports, leads Stephen Colbert to point out that terrorists may not stop at wiring explosives near their junk.
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Wikimedia Commons / David Shankbone
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It’s been a couple years since Comedy Central faux-publican Stephen Colbert took masterfully aimed pot shots at former President George W. Bush at the 2006 White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner—i.e., the night Colbert almost threw himself under a Washington, D.C., bus. Quite a bit has changed ... (continued)
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Glenn Beck is pushing it, as are Laura Ingraham and Bill O’Reilly. Nothing shores you up better for the coming Obamapocalypse than gold, that familiar, shiny and dependable element that calls to you, as Stephen Colbert points out, from the periodic table. Or if you don’t have gold, try women—or sheep.
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Do Americans really need to know how sausage gets made over at the Federal Reserve? As Stephen Colbert points out, there may be a little pig rectum in the mix, but as long as the Fed’s minions are allowed to perform their secret rituals, which may or may not involve ritual chicken slaughter, we all profit in the end, no?
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As usual, Glenn Beck exhibits an, um, unusual political sensibility in his analysis of Barack Obama’s West Point speech and the president’s plan to send 30,000 more American troops to Afghanistan. Luckily, Stephen Colbert is on hand to translate Beck’s logic puzzles with the help of his other favorite plastic friends, GI Joe and My Little Pony.
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President Barack Obama clearly brought great shame upon his nation by taking a deep bow from the waist during his recent visit to Japan. This ill-conceived gesture undoubtedly revealed that he’s weaker than Karl Rove’s chin—and that was even before he got to China.
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Having trouble finding gainful employment in these difficult times? Wouldn’t it be great if, say, Lorenzo Lamas could help you out in your job search for the low, low price of $300? Lucky for you, this is an achievable dream—or you can do it for free with a handy e-mail-ready semi-personalized endorsement from Stephen Colbert.
Posted on Oct 27, 2009
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Stephen Colbert is on a serious tear in this “Colbert Report” clip from Tuesday night’s show, tackling religious symbology, reptilian champion of atheism Christopher Hitchens, canary-eating Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia and the infamous Three-Fifths Compromise all in one go—and that’s before he busts into the Apostles’ Creed.
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When President Obama Chicago lost out to Rio for the 2016 Olympic Games, none were more pleased than the members of a conservative organization called—wait for it—Americans for Prosperity. Well, they didn’t specify whose prosperity they were rooting for, as Stephen Colbert points out in this clip.
Posted on Oct 6, 2009
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Boy, Stephen Colbert got a lot accomplished on “The Colbert Report” this past week! He established whose God was best (duh) and why writing an Op-Ed in The New York Times is a clear sign of desperation and defeat (double duh), and he even managed to outdo Rep. Barney Frank in the table-talk department. But with what kind of cracker does Obamargarine go best? Hmmm.
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Immigration: Time to Choose Sides
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