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Revisiting ‘After Pat’s Birthday’

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Posted on Aug 20, 2010
Pat and Kevin Tillman
Courtesy of the Tillman Family

Pat Tillman, left, and brother Kevin stand in front of a Chinook helicopter in Saudi Arabia before their tour of duty as Army Rangers in Iraq in 2003.

By Kevin Tillman

In light of the release of the must-see documentary “The Tillman Story” (reviewed by Richard Schickel at Truthdig, and Stephen Holden in The New York Times), we reprint Kevin Tillman’s classic 2006 Truthdig piece on the death of his brother, Pat.

It is Pat’s birthday on November 6, and elections are the day after.  It gets me thinking about a conversation I had with Pat before we joined the military.  He spoke about the risks with signing the papers.  How once we committed, we were at the mercy of the American leadership and the American people.  How we could be thrown in a direction not of our volition.  How fighting as a soldier would leave us without a voice ... until we got out. 

Much has happened since we handed over our voice:

Somehow we were sent to invade a nation because it was a direct threat to the American people, or to the world, or harbored terrorists, or was involved in the September 11 attacks, or received weapons-grade uranium from Niger, or had mobile weapons labs, or WMD, or had a need to be liberated, or we needed to establish a democracy, or stop an insurgency, or stop a civil war we created that can’t be called a civil war even though it is.  Something like that.

Somehow our elected leaders were subverting international law and humanity by setting up secret prisons around the world, secretly kidnapping people, secretly holding them indefinitely, secretly not charging them with anything, secretly torturing them.  Somehow that overt policy of torture became the fault of a few “bad apples” in the military.

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Somehow back at home, support for the soldiers meant having a five-year-old kindergartener scribble a picture with crayons and send it overseas, or slapping stickers on cars, or lobbying Congress for an extra pad in a helmet.  It’s interesting that a soldier on his third or fourth tour should care about a drawing from a five-year-old; or a faded sticker on a car as his friends die around him; or an extra pad in a helmet, as if it will protect him when an IED throws his vehicle 50 feet into the air as his body comes apart and his skin melts to the seat.

Somehow the more soldiers that die, the more legitimate the illegal invasion becomes. 

Somehow American leadership, whose only credit is lying to its people and illegally invading a nation, has been allowed to steal the courage, virtue and honor of its soldiers on the ground. 

Somehow those afraid to fight an illegal invasion decades ago are allowed to send soldiers to die for an illegal invasion they started.

Somehow faking character, virtue and strength is tolerated.

Somehow profiting from tragedy and horror is tolerated.

Somehow the death of tens, if not hundreds, of thousands of people is tolerated.

Somehow subversion of the Bill of Rights and The Constitution is tolerated.

Somehow suspension of Habeas Corpus is supposed to keep this country safe.

Somehow torture is tolerated.

Somehow lying is tolerated. 

Somehow reason is being discarded for faith, dogma, and nonsense. 

Somehow American leadership managed to create a more dangerous world.

Somehow a narrative is more important than reality.

Somehow America has become a country that projects everything that it is not and condemns everything that it is.

Somehow the most reasonable, trusted and respected country in the world has become one of the most irrational, belligerent, feared, and distrusted countries in the world.

Somehow being politically informed, diligent, and skeptical has been replaced by apathy through active ignorance.

Somehow the same incompetent, narcissistic, virtueless, vacuous, malicious criminals are still in charge of this country.

Somehow this is tolerated.

Somehow nobody is accountable for this.

In a democracy, the policy of the leaders is the policy of the people.  So don’t be shocked when our grandkids bury much of this generation as traitors to the nation, to the world and to humanity.  Most likely, they will come to know that “somehow” was nurtured by fear, insecurity and indifference, leaving the country vulnerable to unchecked, unchallenged parasites. 

Luckily this country is still a democracy.  People still have a voice.  People still can take action.  It can start after Pat’s birthday. 



Brother and Friend of Pat Tillman,

Kevin Tillman


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Calabashe's avatar

By Calabashe, March 6, 2012 at 11:32 am Link to this comment

Patrick Peters, IMHO, Kevin is also a hero with thier Mom, Mary, right up there too.

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By Patrick Peters, March 5, 2012 at 9:31 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Kevin,

I just finished reading the amazing book written by your mother.

Your article and her book give people an idea about what a hero your brother was and is as an example to America.

You have an amazing family and I am glad I got to know a bit more about them.  I think the bridge should indeed be The Pat Tillman Bridge.

Sincere best wishes.

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By Tim, March 3, 2012 at 10:55 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

I see things differently then most people here.  Pat did have an issue with the war in Iraq, but he had a different view of Afghanistan where he was killed.  The U.S. has no gains in Afghanistan unlike Iraq.  We are there just to fight terrorism. 
I have been on 2 tours in Iraq and leaving on a tour to Afghanistan in 2 weeks.  I don’t think that the cover up about Pat Tillman was the best thing to do.  Nor, do I think that the administration did it for political points.  We, as military, did the cover up to honor a great patriot.  Would O’Neal or Baer gotten a Silver Star and so much publicity?  No!  But, they would have gotten a medal and they would have been remembered as heroes.  Not just a mark on a tour.
I was in the 502nd Infantry at Fort Campbell and we had a story about a hero from the unit during WW2, Joe E Mann.  The story is that after heroic fighting a grenade landed in his position and he threw himself on it to save his fellow soldiers.  The rumor in the unit was that his squad leader threw him on the granade.  I don’t really care if he threw himself on it or someone pushed him on to the grenade.  The fact is that he was wounded after fighting bravely and died as a hero.  If I was the closest to a grenade in the same situation, I would hope my squad leader would do the same thing if I didn’t jump on it first.  Some might think that is not moral or just plain killing someone, but we all offer our lives to save each other when we go to combat.  If I can die to save some of my fellow soldiers, I would do it.  The fact is that situation with the grenade may have been the only way to prevent multiple deaths.  If he was in front of the squad leader, then the squad leader could not jump on it himself.
Really it just comes down to perspective.  Pat Tillman wanted to be a quiet hero.  He always was exactly that.  His family has lost sight of that because of the cover up.  Let Pat be a hero.

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By faith, August 24, 2010 at 2:06 pm Link to this comment

As I read Kevin Tillman’s words once again, I am reminded and inspired by his
clarity, communication, and bravery to share such words.  Tragic, but wonderful
words-concepts-meaning.
Thank you Mr. Tillman. 
May your brother rest in peace.

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By berniem, August 23, 2010 at 1:53 pm Link to this comment

Despite a contrived unemployment “crisis” which I believe is perpetuated to keep America’s youth flocking to the UNIFORM for lack of other viable options, it must soon, HOPEfully, become obvious to the majority of those affected that they are not enlisting in their country’s patriotic war on terror(or whatever the euphemism de jour is)but are volunteering in the cause of neo-liberal economic hegemony and forceful commandeering of the world’s critical resources as we have seen fit to squander ours in never ending quest for material nirvana. One just need look at the shameful treatment of returning vets(if they are permitted under “stop loss”) and the “sudden” discovery of mineral wealth in Afghanistan(to prop up sagging support?)to see that all of the RAH,RAH flag waving and “support the troops” BS is nothing but window dressing to disguise the greed of the corpoatocracy and it’s governmental subsidiary!

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LocalHero's avatar

By LocalHero, August 23, 2010 at 11:38 am Link to this comment

People need to stop calling this “friendly-fire” and call it what it really is; fratricide.

There was no way the crime bosses in the military/government could allow Pat Tillman to return home as a (now) anti-war “hero” so they exercised their only remaining option and killed him in a place that would allow them to construct a plausible lie.

This is in no way “friendly-fire” except in the sense that his executioner (most likely) spoke English.

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By raykeith7, August 23, 2010 at 11:22 am Link to this comment

America is a democracy is rapid decline! Few realize how fast the rest of the world is going to realize the fact that w/o outside sources proping up our deleted economy, the greenback is to become so devalued, marshall law itself is going to be in check! Those independent souls living in the mountians will ‘most likely’ be the last survivors in this ‘So-Called Democracy’.
Why did the milatary leave Iraq at night ahead of schedual?
There was no win in Iraq- we were handed our ass’es!

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Calabashe's avatar

By Calabashe, August 23, 2010 at 8:50 am Link to this comment

From what I’ve seen and read so far (Looking for an SF showing) I think Amir Bar-Lev’s film is the story Pat would want told in the way it should be told.

As for this essay - Kevin turns prose into poetry.

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miroslav's avatar

By miroslav, August 23, 2010 at 7:31 am Link to this comment

And Obambi, Harvard Law School Editor, immediately said ” to put the past behind us.” Until the US war criminals, going back to Brzezinski, are put on trial… the US justice system will be a mere charade. http://www.facebook.com/mike.roloff1?ref=name

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BR549's avatar

By BR549, August 23, 2010 at 7:08 am Link to this comment

Brilliant ...... a perfect description of our dysfunctional political system.

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By Guy Montag, August 21, 2010 at 4:11 pm Link to this comment

In his “The Fog of War” interview with Jason Guerrasio, Amir Bar-Lev, the director of “The Tillman Story,” said:  “… there’s been no culpability on the second half of this tragedy, which is the higher ups trying to cover it up. … to borrow a football metaphor, they [the Tillman family] ran the ball 99 yards over four years time, they handed it off at the one-yard line to Congress and they fumbled it….”

Shortly after Sundance, Bar-Lev emailed me that “he was pretty hard on the Democratic Congress in his film.”  True, his film does portray Congressman Waxman’s Oversight Committee as ineptly failing to get answers from the top military leadership during their hearing.

However, Bar-Lev’s film missed the ”untold story” that both the Democratic Congress and the Obama Presidency have intentionally protected General Stanley McChrystal from scrutiny and punishment for his central role in the cover-up of Pat Tillman’s friendly-fire death.  This cover-up was a thoroughly bi-partisan affair.  It wasn’t just a case of the Bush administration and the Army stonewalling the Democratic Congress.  Congress didn’t just “fumble” the ball, they threw the game.

Five years ago, Pat Tillman’s family were handed a tarnished Silver Star. It was a travesty of justice that President Obama and the Senate promoted General McChrystal to the Army’s highest rank, and handed him his fourth star.

It’s not surprising that after their initial cover-up of Pat Tillman’s friendly-fire death fell apart, Army officers and the Bush administration lied to protect their careers.  But after they took control of both Houses of Congress in 2006, the Democrats (including Congressman Waxman, Senator Levin, Senator Webb, and Senator McCain) could have gone after those responsible.  Or at least not promoted them twice!

Just before the 2006 mid-term elections, Kevin Tillman published his eloquent letter, “After Pat’s Birthday”.  Kevin had hoped a Democratic Congress would bring accountability back to our country.  But, just as with warrantless wiretapping and torture, those responsible for the cover-up of his brother’s friendly-fire death have never been held accountable for their actions.

Last week, I posted “The [Untold] Tillman Story” – President Obama and the Bi-Partisan Congressional Whitewash of General Stanley McChrystal’s Cover-up of Pat Tillman’s Friendly-Fire Death,  at http://www.feralfirefighter.blogspot.com and scribd.com

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By David Moore, August 21, 2010 at 2:54 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Kevin: As a Vietnam veteran (who also briefly served in a Ranger company) my heart goes out to you. I lost friends, not a brother. It is my generation who really screwed this up, but these were people who dodged the war and considered me—and now you—suckers. I didn’t like them then and less even now. Unfortunately, the next generation seems to be just as bad as Bush, Cheney, et alia.

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By Clash, August 21, 2010 at 12:27 pm Link to this comment

Some understood the empire and it’s insatiable appetite for power and control would not be placated until the irrational dreams of small minded men were some how satiated. Some did not. This is a game that is always being payed, it began a very long time ago when the idea, the lie, the noble lie was first used to control the minds of the collective society.

To expect outcomes other than what has transpired is naive. The legion has always been the legion, and the empire has always been the empire The warnings were there people chose to ignore them due to some misguided sense of morality or duty fabricated by the very same small minds that still lie every day to maintain there position of control.

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By Ralph Kramden, August 20, 2010 at 7:47 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

This is the way so called civilized people are capable of the most horrendous crimes. If you ever watched “Hotel Terminus” the Germans were always saying: “We didn’t know what was going on.” So do we in the USA empire:we never knew we were torturing;just read about the coffin-sized, damp cells where people are placed, or the wrapping a towel abouts one’s kneck and then slamming their heads against a solid wall. But we are Christians. The German’s buckle had an imprint: “Gott mit uns.” God is with us. Hemingway always wore that buckle. Good sense of irony and humor.So, “In God we trust,” heaven knows which God that refers to, maybe Techzachoatl who required the sacrifice of 10,000 humans a day.

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