I am really tired of hearing these oh so enlighted liberals kvetching about my president. True he is responsible for the murder of a couple of million hapless Iraqis and Afganis, and maybe 5 thousand American soldiers, and a few thousand more civilians who bought it on 9/11. But in terms of the larger picture he is a gift from God, and it behooves us to be grateful. With awe and reverence I say, ‘Allah Ho Akbar’.

Were it not for president Bush we would have slipped slowly and inexorably into Facism, with the liberal chorus kvetching its outrage from the sidelines like a posse of self-important pigeons clucking at the depredations of the crows. But due to his unseemly haste and astonising ineptitude the great American People are actually beginning to wonder dimly if something bad might not be happening, like a mule who has been whacked on the head and is beginning to take notice. And the kids in particular are refusing to submit.

When one considers the odds of this crazy sequence of events it is clear that we are in the presence of a miracle. The only proper response is to contemplate it in silent awe.

Bush can’t be a moron.  He has survived and escaped impeachment despite having a criminal record as president with the opposition party in control of both houses of congress.  Richard Nixon would love it.

Time to repeat the only two truths you need to assimilate to understand everything about the Bushitter gang:
1. It is about oil;
2. Bush is a moron.

Read!!!——who has the time?  Remember all you need to know is already prepared for you in Cliff’s Notes!  Whether you’re in Harvard, Yale, or Oshkosh Community College Cliff’s Notes rule.

We all know of the shrub’s inability to form a complete sentence with the proper grammar, but are we truly to believe that this man does not read any books?  How in the Hell, did he get through Yale? Being a legacy will only get you so far, did he make it through on his good looks and charm, or was there something else that helped him get his diploma?  This truly cheapens the university system of the United States, when the President of our country, a supposed university graduate states that, ” I have no intention of reading Scott McClellan’s book, because it’s a book.” 
That speaks more loudly than any other thing that he has said in the almost 8 years he has been the head of our country.  No wonder this country is in the shape it’s in.  We have leaders who will not listen or read any objections to their way of thinking, they are the “deciders” and no one will change their minds.  I am appalled at the lack of foresight of the American people for letting this complete and total “idjit” into the most powerful position in the world. Should we, the American people allow Sen. John McCain into this, the most important office in the world, G-d help the world, for he is just as much an ignoramus as the shrub.

Our ‘Dear Leader’ also hasn’t read the Constitution of the United States of America, the last edition of ‘Maxim’, any opinion from the Supreme Court, books/articles with “big words”, and anything written by Al Gore. However, President Incurious has read ‘Mein Kampf’ and the ‘Complete Works of John Yoo’. The writings by Yoo came “highly recommended” by the Inquisitor Torquemada and Boosh found them “utterly fascinating!”
Just goes to illustrate the conjecture, illiteracy can be a valuable tool when waging high treason and tyranny.

Books are for nerds; everybody knows that cheerleaders don’t read books because they aren’t nerdy.  And anyway, i really wanted to be a baseball player like my dad. (You won’t laugh at me when i’m president…like my dad…you won’t laugh at me then.  I’ll show you all!)

This just in:

White House Press spokesperson Dana White has announced the president does indeed have a copy of former press secretary Scott McClellan’s book. 

“He fully intends to familiarize himself with the book,” she said.

When asked if he was going to read the book, she responded, “Just as soon as the book gets back from being bronzed, he will definitely take a look at it.”

In other news, sources from inside the White House have announced that Jena’s book will be re-published in pop-up form.

“The president feels in order to reach a wider audience, the book needs to be in a more appealing format.” The source said. Adding, “He cant wait to get his hands on it!”

In response to the question, “Why now?” The source answered, “The president feels strongly that every home in America should have a library of good books to compliment the decor. Especially ones that make things “pop.”

LOL…Andy is at his best again. I love this part:

“...If I didn’t read the Iraq Study Group’s report, I really don’t think I’m about to read Scott McClellan’s little book.”

The truth of this is so tragic, that we’ve gotta laugh to keep from crying sometimes.