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Olympic Hide and SeekPosted on Apr 20, 2008Fearful about the prospect of human-rights protesters ruining the 2008 Olympics in Beijing, China today announced a plan to move the summer games to a remote location where no one can find them. A spokesman for the Chinese Ministry of Sport, Wu Qingxiu, said that the plan to move the Olympics to an undisclosed location has “advanced from the planning stage into the doing stage.” The reasoning behind the move was simple, Wu told reporters: “You cannot protest what you cannot find.” While rumors swirled about where the Olympics might be relocated, the Chinese official said that all such speculation is futile: “China is a very large country, and if you want to hide the Olympics, it is a very easy thing to do.” In order to keep the new location a secret, Wu revealed that China had not even disclosed it to NBC, who has a contract to televise the 2008 summer games. This decision drew an outraged response from NBC Chairman Jeff Zucker, who told reporters in New York, “If NBC doesn’t know where the Olympics are, no one will watch them.” Wu took exception to Mr. Zucker’s comment about no one watching the Olympics, responding, “That sounds like a typical NBC show to me.” On the campaign trail, Sen. Hillary Clinton blasted China’s human rights record, telling an audience in Pittsburgh, “I have always fought for human rights in China, which is why I risked my life in Tiananmen Square.” Award-winning humorist, television personality and film actor Andy Borowitz is author of “The Republican Playbook.” © 2008 Creators Syndicate Inc. Previous item: ABC's Philadelphia Story: Punditry Over Politics Next item: The Left Has Lost Its Way Elsewhere: . CommentsAre you a Truthdig member yet? Login now, or register with Truthdig.
By Lester Ness, May 13 at 3:50 pm # Total crapTotal crap. I’m not a big of the modern Olympics, and wish they had only the events of the originals (all athletes naked and barefoot, of course), but the authorities in Beijing will certainly have the games in Beijing. Lester Ness
By Deborah, April 21 at 3:25 am # The word "gullible" is so not in theI thought the comment about a “typical NBC show” was a brutal but great slam and then I read the closer about Clinton in Tiananmen Square and realized this was supposed to be funny. no giggles, minor amusement
By DennisD, April 20 at 9:45 pm # “China today announced a plan to move the summer games to a remote location where no one can find them” I guess this means they’ll put the summer games in the U.S. Congress where no one can find accountability for anything.
By Nino, April 20 at 8:04 pm # Why would any civilized nation want to send their athletes to such a backward cruel nation like China anyway..they have sent us foodstuffs that are not healthy..toys for our tiny tots that are not healthy and their treatment of Christians is also..not healthy!!! I guess its busines as usual..
By Lester Ness, May 13 at 3:56 pm # Re: barbarous country?Nino, China has lots of problems which could use some rational criticism, but evidently Truthdig is not the place to find it. If you were to come, teach English, in China, as I have, you’d find the people are not barbarous, neither individually nor as a collectivity. Daily life here is not worse than anywhere else, and in some respects, better than in the USA. Lester Ness Add Your Comment |
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