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Barry Golson: Stop U.S.-Canada Immigration Now!

Posted on Nov 14, 2006
U.S. - Canada relations
From CNN

By Barry Golson

“We want Mexico to look like Canada. It’s so wealthy and stable, we barely know it’s there most of the time.” —Stephen Haber, director of Stanford University’s Social Science History Institute.

Ottawa, Nov. 5, 2009

The House of Commons in Canada’s Parliament today passed its final legislation of 2009, a controversial bill to strengthen Canada’s border with the U.S. The bill calls for erecting a wall across the continent from Nova Scotia to British Columbia, similar to the wall and demilitarized zone at the U.S. border with Mexico.

“Illegal American immigrants continue to take Canadian jobs,” said the Hon. Dashell Samuels, Minister of Public Safety.  Samuels cited the estimated 10 million American “illegals” who “mow our lawns and bus our tables at below the minimum wage,” disrupting the Canadian economy.

As widely reported, since the Great Canadian Oil Discovery of 2007, Canada’s minimum wage has risen to $80 an hour (in Canadian dollars, now worth $3.60 USD), while median personal income in Canada has risen to $385,000 per capita. As a result, American illegals have been surging across the border to take work that Canadians are too busy with their investments to do themselves.


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The Hon. Lawrence Harmon, Minister of Transport, also announced today increased security at all Canadian airports after the hijacking of a New York-to-Toronto United Airlines flight last week by job seekers from Massapequa, Long Island. This follows the near-drownings last month of six Vermonters who attempted to run their powerboat up Niagara Falls.

Robert Grenville, head of Ottawa’s Civil Liberties for Immigrants group, opposed the bill’s passage, saying, “Just because Canada now produces two-thirds of the world’s oil is no reason to demonize illegals. Americans are hard-working, semi-educated, and often honest people. We have a moral responsibility, as the world’s most prosperous country, to create a legal path to citizenship for those now within our borders.”

Grenville’s remarks were promptly denounced by Quebec MP Francois LeGros as “l’amnestie infernale,” and he again called for the deportation of all undocumented Americans.

In the U.S., Pat Buchanan renewed his call for military intervention in Canada to take over the giant oil fields “for the common good” and to create lebensraum for lightly-complected Christo-Americans, “like the swell folks I grew up with.”  This echoed Lou Dobbs’ on-air declaration that he favors using America’s own Mexican illegals as “cannon fodder” in an invasion of Canada.  Both Dobbs and Buchanan have announced that, in the event of a U.S. takeover of Canada, they support frog-marching Quebec’s French speakers to special Berlitz camps for English immersion classes. 

Meanwhile, in Alberta and Manitoba, armed members of a vigilante group calling themselves Minute Mounties have been patrolling the border, many taking potshots at Americans trying to sneak across in their aging SUVs.  But one volunteer, Edmonton sheep rancher and philanthropist Joe Bartlett, said he was a “compassionate conservative” on U.S. immigrants.

“I can’t really blame them,” he said. “If you had a country to the north paying 10 to 20 times your wages, wouldn’t you want to find work there?”  He paused to lock and load his rifle.  “Still,” he said, “this is the Canadian dream. Let immigrants find their own dream, eh?”

Barry Golson is the author of Gringos in Paradise: An American Couple Builds Their Retirement Dream House in a Seaside Village in Mexico. (Scriber, Nov. 2006)

The book was developed from an article in AARP magazine, for which Golson was awarded the Lowell Thomas Travel Writing Award in 2004.

The book’s website can be found at

Currently the founding editor of, Golson is the former editor in chief of Yahoo! Internet Life, the former executive editor of Playboy, TV Guide and World Press Review.

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By Spinoza, November 20, 2006 at 8:12 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

>>>>>>>>You wall obstructionist close your fence gate or lock your house doors at night? You do? Why is that? The fence south of San Diego drastically reduced illegal crossings, contraband, street drugs and crime. <<<<<<<<

Err: No I don’t lock my house at night nor anything else.

I do lock it when I leave the property BECAUSE WE LIVE IN A CAPITALIST SOCIETY and suffer from income inequality.  When I lived on a kibbutz nothing was ever locked.

Idiot Amerikkkans do not understand that if we did away with our society that promotes inequality there would be no need to lock anything.  Everyone has the right to live anywhere they want on the planet. Eliminate borders.



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By rabblerowzer, November 20, 2006 at 3:38 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Forget Iran, we Must Bomb Canada.

NeoCons have ignored Canada, focusing all their attention instead on the Middle East. Canada has lots of oil, too, and we won’t have to ship it all the way across the Atlantic. We can build pipelines, thus cutting costs.

I’ve always suspected that Canada has Imperial ambitions to depose the USA as the Big Dog on the block. Some might say that the Canadians are not a warlike people, but anyone who has ever spent a winter in Canada knows they have plenty of reasons to make a sneak attack on the US. Seizing California would make the attack worthwhile all by itself.

Can anyone doubt that Canadians secretly covet our warmer climate and beautiful beaches. Have you ever been to a beach in Canada? They have icebergs right offshore!

We must nuke them before they nuke us.

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By John Konop, November 19, 2006 at 5:11 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Cynthia Tucker sells-out African Americans

Cynthia used her voice today, at the Atlanta Journal Constitutional editorial page to rant about anyone who dares attempts to enforce our immigration laws. Her article used stereo types and no facts to support that our economy would collapse without an unlimited supply of illegal immigrants. Even the most liberal open border economist like Paul Krugman admits that illegal immigration is a drain on our economy.

Cynthia lets talk about facts. African Americans have been the biggest victims of illegal immigration and many do not support the open border-Amnesty immigration policy that you promote. Read for yourself.

WASHINGTON — Frank Morris has been outraged as he has watched leaders in the African American community stand arm-in-arm with Latino groups in support of immigrant rights.

Morris, the former director of the Congressional Black Caucus Foundation, a retired college professor and a current board member of the Center for Immigration Studies, said immigrants compete directly for jobs with African Americans, driving down wages and working conditions while in the country illegally.

“As long as there is an available labor supply, (immigrants) will be preferred to African Americans,” Morris said. “Employers prefer illegal immigrants because they can be exploited without any recourse.”

Robert Brown, an Emory University professor who studies African American politics, said many blacks are “less than sympathetic” to the plight of immigrants. Although many aren’t willing to speak publicly on the issue for fear of angering Latinos, a peek inside the editorial pages of African American newspapers, glimpses into town hall meetings and a look at national polls all indicate that many black Americans are uneasy about supporting immigrant rights.

Do you think Cynthia is an elitist selling-out hard working families by her support for open borders?

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By rachelle, November 16, 2006 at 4:31 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

R.A. Earl (38194)

I suspect this article is more than dead already, but just for the record,  “Maintiens the droit” simply means, literally, to maintain (or sustain) what is right. We all know what ‘right’ means, but the motto is not intended as a reference to Canada’s constitution, only to justice: maintain what is right.

Let’s just hope your idea of ‘right’ resembles mine. ‘Cause there are a lot of sickos out there.  As for the motto of the R.C.M.P., I think it is quite befitting.

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By C Quil, November 16, 2006 at 11:10 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

In answer to R.A Earl -

“Mantiens le droit.” - My mistake. That is indeed the official motto of the Mounties. Apparently the “we always get our man” thing came from a newspaper review of a Hollywood movie about the Mounties, and thereafter took on a life of its own.

As a dyed-in-the-wool Canadian, and a Québecoise - though not of the “pure laine” variety - I’m deeply ashamed.

And the crack about height restrictions - it was a comment on how I first read the “Minute Mounties” phrase in the article - not “minute” as “in a New York minute” but as “my-NEWT” or “really, really small”.

And water to sand in Saskatchewan? Only a reference to the predictions of the dire consequences of global warming and climate change on the prairies (and everywhere else, for that matter).

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By Derek, November 16, 2006 at 2:18 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

None of these open borders people are saying a thing about Brazil, Switzerland, Japan, Mexico, Egypt, Malaysia and every other country’s immigration policy.  The US already has the most lenient immigration policy in the world. 

What you all seem to make the point is, America is up for grabs, anyone can take it.  Somehow Americans are the bad guys(like usual) when they want to have a country with borders like every other country.

If you are comfortable with an open border than you should be comfortable with an open house.  Anyone can come in without warning.  How many of you open border people are comfortable with an open house?  Because I’m in dire straights and need a place to stay.

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By R. A. Earl, November 15, 2006 at 1:01 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Hey, Bukko… for the record…

The motto of the R.C.M.P since 1954 has been “MAINTIENS LE DROIT” - roughly translated (in my crummy French anyway, as “Maintaining the right.” I’m not certain whose “right” they mean… theirs to do what all police tend to do - power trip on the rest of us, or, to maintain our right to do as we damn well please, within reason).

Since the Arar fiasco, where the R.C.M.P. provided apparently false information to US authorities which played some role in Arar being transported by them to Syria for a couple of years’ worth of torture, some wit has offered a new motto for the R.C.M.P. - “Smear Campaigns are our Specialty!”

And as far as Saskatchewan goes… believe me there’s plenty of both sand and water to last a million years here. I kinda hope the fence does go up… it will help keep Americans where they belong… in the good old USA… where they and they alone can reap the benefits of the great wisdom of their leaders!

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By GW=MCHammered, November 15, 2006 at 11:53 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

You wall obstructionist close your fence gate or lock your house doors at night? You do? Why is that? The fence south of San Diego drastically reduced illegal crossings, contraband, street drugs and crime.

My last trip through Canada I overheard conversations about how dangerous America has become with guns, gangs and school shootings. They don’t understand why we want to live this way. They may need a fence to protect them from us. Many Germans voiced the same thing: they see us as a violent society and some small-town elderly were actually afraid of me once they understood I was American. Very sad. We Yankee-Doodlers could use a long hard look in the mirror minus the red, white and blue blindfold. Then maybe we could turn the delusion to reality that we are the greatest nation in the world.

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By C Quil, November 15, 2006 at 11:10 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

It might be warm in Saskatchewan in 2010, but I don’t think there’ll be enough water for swimming pools. The Saskatchewanians might need someone to groom the sandbox, though. And they’ll probably give you a free pancreas transplant to get rid of the need for pesky insulin injections every day.

The virtual walls are going up between Canada and the U.S. though - biometric passports, inaccurate and unsupervised “terrorist suspect” watch lists, privacy invasion of every sort.

Quebec colleges offer international triligual degrees - in English, French and Spanish. Tons of Canadians are bilingual, but the two languages might not be English and French.

I do like the idea of the Minute Mounties though. Since Canadian Armed Forces fitness requirements have been relaxed (just like the recruits), the height restrictions on the RCMP might we waived too. They might have to change their motto: “We always get out man, although it might take a lot more of us to do it.”

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By rabblerowzer, November 15, 2006 at 8:42 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

This story is funny today, but five or ten years from now it might come true. By then our corporations will likely have outsourced all but minimum wage jobs, so young college graduate engineers will be competing with illegal aliens for busboy jobs. Hey, that’s the plan.

Of course, what with Rabid Right’s plans for world domination, there will always be a big demand for soldiers . . . unless they can entice illegal immigrants into joining our armed forces for citizenship. That’s the way Rome did it. They hired mercenaries to fight their wars, both foreign and domestic civil wars. It’s possible that Mexicans might be used one day to crush rebellions in America.

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By sPINOZA, November 15, 2006 at 7:22 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Great hilarious article. Points to the absurdity of the fascists.

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By R. A. Earl, November 14, 2006 at 10:14 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

I guess the grain of truth in this humor is the “wall.”

I don’t pray but I do hope (which is also useless as a strategy but at least I can do it with my eyes open).

I hope I’m wrong but I fear that there isn’t enough intelligence on either side of the border to PREVENT a wall from being constructed.

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By Beeswax, November 14, 2006 at 5:58 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

A wall on each side of the United States’ borders. Sounds more and more like something troublesome is going to happen between those walls in the years to come. Time to open our eyes Americans.

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By rachelle, November 14, 2006 at 5:56 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

This is a joke, no doubt. Hahahaha! Only one thing wrong with the humor:  it’s not really funny, in a way, to suggest that “Mexican illegals (should be) used as “cannon fodder” in an invasion of Canada, and that the Civil Liberties for Immigrants Group supports “frog-marching Quebec’s French speakers to special Berlitz camps for English immersion classes.”

Perhaps it’s the American invaders who should move out of those areas of the U.S. that they have taken over from the Mexicans, and it’s the anglos in Canada who should be ‘frog-marched’ into Berlitz camps for French immersion classes. Still, I recognize that the intent was humorous. So… I’ll just let it go. Enjoy.

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By Bukko in Australia, November 14, 2006 at 5:26 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Hello! I’m writing to you from the year 2010, thanks to the time-bending technology invented by the Chinese last year. I want to tell you why I immigrated into Canada illegally in 2008.

It wasn’t just for the money. A major reason was for the health care. I’m diabetic, and I couldn’t afford $500 for a bottle of U.S. insulin that only lasted a month. It didn’t seem fair for me to have to die because I have a health condition that Canucks get treated for at almost no charge. The people in Saskatchewan who let me work as their pool boy (amazing how warm it got there because of climate change) would give me their outdated bottles each month, and if I played it right, I’d only be hyperglycaemic for two weeks a month. And I wouldn’t have to undergo the mandatory prayers and laying on of hands that’s the basis of U.S. faith-based health care. (Why did the preacher insist on me always laying my hands THERE on him?)

Unfortunately, I was apprehended by one of these nationalist Mountie groups and deported, but at least they shipped me to Australia to work as a polisher in the solar panel fields. At least I didn’t have to go back to what’s left of the formerly United States! I’d tell you what happened, but it might lead a lot of you to kill yourselves, and that could change the course of future history. Bloody Chinese still haven’t worked through all the ramifications of this technology…

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