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 The Brand-a-Baby BizPosted on Jun 25, 2007
From $50 for a list of suggestions to $475 for a numerologist to test the positive and negative associations of a certain name, the baby name business is booming. Sociologists and name researchers are reporting an increase in the level of stress that parents-to-be experience when choosing baby names. Adding to the pressure are celebrities whose baby monikers read like bad science fiction or trendy cocktail names (see Pilot Inspektor Riesgraf-Lee and Apple Martin, respectively). Naming a baby can be like branding a product: Parents want their children to stand out without being too trendy.
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Jump to Comments
By peedeecee, June 26, 2007 at 4:17 pm #
I like C Quil’s idea of not naming kids for the location where they were conceived—we’d have kids named “‘57 Ford Back Seat,” “Quickie Motel,” “Behind the Filing Cabinets,” and (my personal fave) “Business Class.”
Report thisBy noodle, June 26, 2007 at 2:27 pm #
When my wife and I married in Italy 1n 1961, we were given a little booklet with space for the names of 13 children we might have. A cautionary note said we were not allowed to give our children names that would hold them up to ridicule in later life. One man, for example, tried to name his child “odiolaguerra” (I hate war), and it was not allowed. Although we agreed with his sentiments, we felt it would have been highly improper to so label a kid. I feel the same way about some of the painful and outlandish names people are now imposing on infants who can’t fight back.
Report thisBy great_satan, June 26, 2007 at 1:58 pm #
Here’s what the wizard of acid has to say:
Report thishttp://www.thebear.org/essays2.html#anchor515747
By RYS, June 26, 2007 at 12:38 pm #
(Unregistered commenter)
Gee Whatever happened to people just taking a name? Most of the people I know don’t use their legal one much anyway.
Report thisBy C Quil, June 26, 2007 at 7:31 am #
Just give your kids they won’t be mortifed about when they grow up. No weird spellings, no celebrities, no cutsie-wootsie ones, no naming them after the places where they were conceived. The last, especially, is likely to do them lasting psychological harm - especially if you tell them the origin of the name.
So - no Kaytelynne or Gerromme, no Paris, Elvis or Puff Daddy, no Kryckette, and definitely no Denver, Sheboygan, Chicago or Vegas.
Report thisBy Dr. Knowitall, PhD, PhD, June 26, 2007 at 5:01 am #
Image is everything; look at our gov.’s manipulation of language. How about the word “spin?” One word can and often does change everything with a population so aurally sensitive. Why wouldn’t a kid’s name be similarly crafted? The really smart people are the ones cashing in on this idiotic phenomenon.
Report thisBy DennisD, June 25, 2007 at 7:43 pm #
(Unregistered commenter)
Has the rest of world signed on to this mind numbing crap or are America’s empty heads once again leading the planet as only we can.
Report thisBy peedeecee, June 25, 2007 at 7:32 pm #
From the article: People who understand branding know that when you pick the right name, youre giving your child a head start.
Puh-leeze. What a manipulative crock of sh*t that is, stated by someone who wants to cash in on the latest breathlessly inane trend.
Report thisBy TDoff, June 25, 2007 at 7:25 pm #
McCain’s campaign committee tried to jump aboard this baby-name trend by offering $100 to any family that would name their baby after John.
But so far, ‘Dumfuk’ and ‘Luzer’ don’t seem to be catching on.
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