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Having an Open Attitude to Kids’ Gender Identity

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Posted on Aug 29, 2006
Gender variance
Photo: zauberbilder.de / Illustration: Peter Scheer

Two private elementary schools in Oakland, California, have adapted to a phenomenon known as gender variance?when kids identify as the opposite sex.  Some grow out of it, some don’t, but the schools’ open attitude is meant to bolster self-esteem and avoid the kind of scars that can follow children into adulthood.

Of course not everyone is thrilled at the idea, one conservative group saying, “God made us male and female, and God makes no mistakes. To teach a child at an early age self-hatred, and that’s what this gender variance is, is very sad.”

But a Bay Area psychiatrist who leads a support group for gender variance argues: “It’s really important that the public be aware this is not something parents can turn their kids into. The data is very clear on this.”


San Francisco Chronicle:

Park Day’s staff members are among a growing number of educators and parents who are acknowledging gender variance in very young children. Aurora School, another private elementary school in Oakland, also is seeing children who are “gender fluid” and hired a clinical psychologist to conduct staff training.

Children with gender variant behaviors feel intensely that they want to look and act like the other sex. They prefer toys and activities typical of the opposite gender. Signs usually start appearing between the ages of 2 and 4.

For some children, it’s a passing phase. Some grow up to be heterosexual, some gay. Some children insist they are the opposite sex although they might have a hard time explaining it. One nurse therapist said a boy once told her, “I think I swallowed a girl.”

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By Autumn Sandeen, August 31, 2006 at 5:47 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuals (NARTH) Scientific Advisory Committee member Joseph Berger, M.D. replied to this article in NARTH’s blog:

I suggest, indeed, letting children who wish go to school in clothes of the opposite sex – but not counseling other children to not tease them or hurt their feelings.

On the contrary, don’t interfere, and let the other children ridicule the child who has lost that clear boundary between play-acting at home and the reality needs of the outside world. Maybe, in this way, the child will re-establish that necessary boundary.

Link to that piece, online responses to Berger’s piece, and the Concerned Women For America audio on the original article:

NARTH response: When is it OK for boys to be girls, and girls to be boys?

National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuals (NARTH) Blog
8/27/2006


Gay conversion groups encouraging child abuse

31-August-2006
Marc Shoffman
PinkNews.co.uk


Truth Wins Out Rebukes ‘Ex-Gay’ Therapist for Promoting Bullying in Schools

8/31/2006
To: National Desk
Source: Truth Wins Out
Contact: Wayne Besen of Truth Wins Out, 917-691-5118


NARTH Scientific Advisory Committee member Joseph Berger advocates children teasing gender-nonconforming peers

By Daniel Gonzales
Ex-Gay Watch
8/31/2006


Oakland’s Gender-Bending Private School (Audio, 6:08 min)

Concerned Women for America
8/28/2006

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By Marti Abernathey, August 29, 2006 at 8:05 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

“God made us male and female, and God makes no mistakes. To teach a child at an early age self-hatred, and that’s what this gender variance is, is very sad.”

Um… tell that to the child with anemia, a cleft palate, or any other congenital abnormality. And teaching self hatred? Gender variance is not taught… how do you teach a 3 year old to be gender variant?

The only thing sad is that there are folks out there that actually buy this illogical reasoning.

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