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Bird Poop as Political Commentary

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Posted on May 24, 2007
poopbush

President George W. Bush was busy praising embattled Attorney General Alberto Gonzales at a press conference Thursday when a bold sparrow swooped overhead and deposited a present on the commander in chief’s left sleeve.  Though a White House spokesperson claimed it was a good sign, we here at Truthdig beg to differ.

Editor’s note:  It is our impression that such portentious avian omens must be administered to the cranial region in order to signify good luck.  Are we mistaken?  Discuss.


ABC News:

As President Bush took a question Thursday in the White House Rose Garden about scandals involving his Attorney General, he remarked, “I’ve got confidence in Al Gonzales doin’ the job.”

Simultaneously, a sparrow flew overhead and left a splash on the President’s sleeve, which Bush tried several times to wipe off.

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By Trigger finger, May 31, 2007 at 3:36 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

How thoughtful of the bird to stack it on the pile.

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By wolfwoman, May 29, 2007 at 2:57 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

And God said “due unto others as you would have them due unto you” and since that all G.W. does to others is dump on them the tables got turned back to him by God. He delegated the task to a sparrow, bombs away. What goes around comes around. To bad it wasn’t a cowbird for the cowboy. Now I am waiting to see how long it takes George to get the “bird flu” that they like to hype up all the time when things get a little dull on the homefront.

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By Louise, May 29, 2007 at 2:25 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

“Editor’s note:  It is our impression that such portentious avian omens must be administered to the cranial region in order to signify good luck.  Are we mistaken?  Discuss.”

The guilty pooper originally was identified as a sparrow. Of course sparrow poop is generally smaller, smears to green and does not dry quickly or wipe off easily. However Raven Poop is a different story.

Since the Department of Homeland Security has identified the offending bird as a Raven (see my earlier post) the gift takes on a whole new meaning. Raven poop tends to be white with a small grayish blob on top. Dries quickly and wipes off much like powder.

Ravens are considered to be the most intelligent of all birds. No doubt contributing to the many legends surrounding them. Every culture has attributed portents and signs to Ravens, from Poe’s “Never More” to the flock of “Ravens that fell dead from the sky” when Alexander the Great entered ancient Babylon in 323, where he died a few weeks later.

Ancient Babylon was located in the heart of modern day Iraq.

Some swear getting pooped on by a bird is good luck. However those who do seemed to have received the “blessing” on the shoulder. Those “gifted” on the head had the exact opposite experience, being delivered with a general run of bad luck.

So, what does all this mean? I don’t know, not being able to find another example of poop dropping on the left forearm.

But, since Ravens are very intelligent birds and since this appeared to have been a single offender, one does have to wonder if he wasn’t sending some sort of message.

“One Raven for sorrow, Two for joy, Three Ravens for a girl, Four for a boy, Five Ravens for silver, Six for gold, Seven Ravens for a secret never to be told.”

“They slept until the black raven, the blithe hearted
proclaimed the joy of heaven”
- Beowulf

Perhaps those ancient words indicate the sleeping giant will awake and end the modern-day attack on Babylon.

Or, perhaps the Ministry of Propaganda had a trained Dove released with instructions to land on the leaders head. The bird getting a taste of freedom chose instead to release his heavy load and head for freedom.

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By JNagarya, May 28, 2007 at 9:00 pm Link to this comment

The sparrow has long been my favorite bird.  This only increases its stature in my esteem.

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By JNagarya, May 28, 2007 at 8:58 pm Link to this comment

“#72785 by Enraged’64 on 5/25 at 9:21 pm
(Unregistered commenter)

“I’m so sick of you libs and your never ending denigration of our troops and their Commander in Chief.”

The troops and the Commander in Chief are not to be confused with each other, or to be viewed as being the same, else the Constitution is ignored and denigrated.

Under the Constitution, our military—the troops—is to be under the control of CIVILIAN leadership.

In the current situation, the “Commander in Chief” is not only a civilian, but also a chickenhawk with no military experience whatsoever, and with a blatant contempt for the military, and those who actually served, and experienced war, such as John Kerry.  And John McCain.

“You’ll be laughing from the other side of your pathetic faces when this country is hit once again by terrorists.”

If that happens, it will be the second time your hero Bushit _FAILED_ to keep his oath to prtect and defend our national security.  Who will you blame that on?  Clinton?

“It’s not a matter of IF it’s only a matter of WHEN”

According to Bushit and Cheney, only the Democrats would allow us to be “hit” by terrorists.  Problem with that fantasy being that Bushit and Cheney are not Democrats, and they were in office on 9/11/2001.

“and I certainly prefer fighting them over in another country, then to have to fight them on our homeland.”

Except that you above point out that that cliche is false: We would be fighting them “over there” when the “hit” you predict over here occurred.

Be careful of big words, son—and here’s one of those coming at you: _THINK_.

“Maybe you can get together with all the terrorist network cells around the world, and make nice with them, and sing Kumbaya, then maybe they wouldn’t feel the need to slaughter thousands of our citizens because we do not share their religion.”

Since you know soi much about those alleged “terrorist cells,” then why don’t you tell Bushit where they are located?—outside that in the White House itself, of course.

The terrorism against the US, and mostly against US “interests” abroad—are not about “religion”.  They are about US meddling in affairs which are none of the US’s business, in bahalf of interests hostile to those in the locations where the meddlings occur.

That’s too complicated for you to understand, of course; so you have to repeat cliches and slogans and other substanceless and false folderoll in order to believe you have something relevant to say.  Clue: you don’t have anything of value to say because you dispense with truth before you open your mouth.

BTW, Mr. “Patriot”: When will be enlisting, demanding tobe sent to Iraq, and there showing us all how you can win it sinclgle-handedly?

Oh, right: cowardly worms like you haven’t sufficent courage to match the size of your loud mouths.

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By Dale Headley, May 28, 2007 at 10:02 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

So that’s what a piece of poop looks like on a bigger piece of poop.

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By James Yell, May 28, 2007 at 7:05 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Forkboy said it all in answer to the dimness of the right wing. I would like to add that for years before and after 9/11 the Saudi’s have refused to track money funding terrorists and refused to co-operate and have not co-operated except when their very own Frankenstien’s monster has occasionally bitten the hand that feeds them.

It was the Saudi’s buying off the religous radicals that allowed and paid for the formation of the so called schools which taught and encouraged murder of none Moslem and none Moslem orthdox people. It was a wholly Saudi controlled band of gangsters that flew the planes into the World Trade Center buildings and the pentagon and so many more crimes.

We are in this mess because of Ronald Reagan pulling away from Federally mandated research for alternate energy and increased fuel efficiency. The amount of money wasted on the crime of invading Iraq would have paid for a lot of research that would have given long term advantage to the country, unfortunately the government is paid off by corporate greed for easy and huge profits. There is treason here, but not from that mentally unbalance religious nut, the American Taliban.

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By pogblog, May 28, 2007 at 12:37 am Link to this comment

Oh, Hero Bird, a Sign From the Winged—tho I would have preferred a sign from a condor or a pterodactyl.

Still, Dear Blessed Bird who did what we’ve all longed to do for so long—not the canary in the mine, but the canary in the Rose Garden . . .

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By noworryman, May 27, 2007 at 3:58 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Poop begets poop.  Bush and the sparrow know.

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By Louise, May 26, 2007 at 8:33 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

The Department of Homeland Security has identified the terrorist bird that crapped on George W. Bush.
http://www.waynemadsenreport.com/

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By Forkboy, May 26, 2007 at 2:32 pm Link to this comment

Regarding #72785 by Enraged’64 on 5/25 at 2:51 pm

You state “Maybe you can get together with all the terrorist network cells around the world, and make nice with them, and sing Kumbaya, then maybe they wouldn’t feel the need to slaughter thousands of our citizens because we do not share their religion.”

Did you even read your comment before submitting it?  I think anyone would be quite happy to see the end of terrorism if it meant we only had to make nice with them.  We ‘libs’ recognize that this isn’t going to work, but we aren’t foolish enough to assume that invading a country from which no terrorist links existed is equally stupid.  Unfortunately the current administration in the White House isn’t that smart.

We support the soldiers fighting in the Middle East.  We would greatly PREFER they were fighting terrorists and not trying to subdue a civil war.  Al Queda in Iraq?  Yeah, they’re there.  But they are there only because W & Co. put together a war plan that was a complete and utter failure; never taking into account the borders that went unprotected such that others could stream into the country to attack our soldiers.

If YOU truly believed in fighting terrorism then you SHOULD have demanded of your government (it’s not mine - I didn’t vote for it and I genuinely believe it was stolen from the Dems in both 2000 and 2004) that it stay in Afghanistan and done what needed to be done instead of squandering lives, equipment and money on a failed ideological plan for a Middle Eastern democracy.

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By Chaseme, May 26, 2007 at 11:18 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

When you back the film and play it frame by frame, you can see the origin of that was from bush’s mouth (personal observation).

And, if you look closely, he already had some shit on his hands before wiping his sleeve, which is why he did not think of it as a hygiene risk to use his bare hand to wipe it off.

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By Trigger finger, May 26, 2007 at 10:43 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

A man, initials GWB, arrived at heavens gates one day and was met by St Peter.

St Peter said: GW, Welcome to heaven.

Can you tell me about some noble accomplishment you had in all your days on earth? 

Well ah, ah said GW, I ah, ah, he-he, I ah, was driving ma truck cross Texas ah, one day and I came cross a ah, ah gang o’ he-he, o’ Hells Angels who ah was beating up on a ah, woman, he-he, and so I ah, ah, ah, ah, I could clearly see thet ah, she was in deep trouble, see I ah, ah, can see this when most common folk cant. So I stop my truck right ther, and I ah ran up to the first biker, and he ah, had must have ah hundrd tattoo on his body, had a ring in his nose, long greasy hair, well I yanked the ring out of his nose, kicked em in the head, yelled out a warning to the others…..

Thats very noble GW!

When exactly did all this take place asked St Peter?

Ah, Ah, I spose bout a minute or two ago! said GW.

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By AntiMaim, May 26, 2007 at 12:23 am Link to this comment

Signifying a Gonzales whitewash.

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Gabir's avatar

By Gabir, May 25, 2007 at 9:54 pm Link to this comment

To #72785 Enraged’64 ,
  So,so,so,so,soooooooooo sorry you are so sick of us “libs” . At least a majority of the free thinkers you refer to as “libs” have something meaningful and timely to say about the serious issues that face this country and our troops .
  You conservative CLONES have only two or three Mantras that you use repeatedly depending on the matter at hand . It is always 1)You are beating up on Poor King Georgie 2)You are denigrating (big word for a clone)or do not support our troops 3)you are unpatriotic . When will The King or Vice find the time for a new Mantra program for the Clones . You really need some new material .
    While you’re busy wondering what that humming is in your head , why don’t you become a registered commenter ? Is there something you’re afraid of - Like the Big Bad Liberal Wolf blowing your conservative piggy house down ?

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By DennisD, May 25, 2007 at 8:47 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

The feathered drone proved the “no fly zone” around the White House is just more of the same old bird shit. So much for Homeland Security.

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By Louise, May 25, 2007 at 8:41 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Enraged’64(#72785)

So brave and noble.

Drop bombs on a defenseless nation, destroy their homes and cities, kill a few hundred thousand helpless and innocent children, so al-Qaeda will go and fight there ... instead of here.

That’s like leaving your baby in a poopy diaper at the neighbors house so they have to change it. And while they’re at it feed it and toilet train it and raise it. Cause you don’t want to soil your hands, or be bothered until the kid is grown and fun to have around.

Now how selfish is that?

YOUR never ending denigration of our troops by linking them to that Commander in Chief is reprehensible! Unable to accept responsibility for HIS monumental blunder, you always try to imply we are attacking the troops, when in fact we have many troops. And we DON’T believe in human sacrifice!

Perhaps what really enrages you is the frustration of not being able to prove a wrong, right!

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By LANCE, May 25, 2007 at 6:36 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Cheney, “I shot that bird, roasted him and ate him”.

Don’t tell Cheney it was crow.

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By lawlessone, May 25, 2007 at 4:24 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

“Who killed the sparrow?” asked the reporter inanely.
“Me with my bow and arrow” bragged VP Dick Cheney.

“It crapped on my Boss,” justified the shooter so proudly.
“So, it wasn’t a big loss. I declare that quite loudly.”

“Next, I’m hunting the Bin Laden who did that terrible thing.
Sadly, he’s been disguised as a Robin and hiding at the West Wing.”

“That’s why we couldn’t find him despite all our searches.
His nasty acts were little different from our own rightward lurches.”

“A peck-a-dillo it may be for such a bird to hide there.
But, we’ll get him. You’ll see. Cause that’s our own private lair.”

“We’ll catch him and roast him.” said the President’s spokesman.
“Only we are permitted to act lunatic in the open.”

[more irreverence at resistence-is-possible.blogspot.com]

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By Nitro, May 25, 2007 at 4:00 pm Link to this comment

God said not a sparrow will fall without His knowing. If this isn’t a sign from heaven, we’ll never see one. Besides, you all know what that white stuff is on the top of chicken shit is don’t you?

It’s still chicken shit! God Bless the sparrows!

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By Enraged'64, May 25, 2007 at 3:51 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

I’m so sick of you libs and your never ending denigration of our troops and their Commander in Chief.  You’ll be laughing from the other side of your pathetic faces when this country is hit once again by terrorists.  It’s not a matter of IF it’s only a matter of WHEN - and I certainly prefer fighting them over in another country, then to have to fight them on our homeland.  Maybe you can get together with all the terrorist network cells around the world, and make nice with them, and sing Kumbaya, then maybe they wouldn’t feel the need to slaughter thousands of our citizens because we do not share their religion.

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By Ga, May 25, 2007 at 3:27 pm Link to this comment

Comment #72624 by QuyTran:

“It was not a good sign as The White House spokesperson claimed. Just trust me!”

Perhaps when I read more of your posts—and I find that what you say contains wisdom—you will become a trusted source. Until then, could you elaborate?

Other than references to “bird poop brings good luck” urban myths, I am ignorant of this. I’d love to know deeper, older sources.

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By iBix, May 25, 2007 at 3:24 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Heckuva job, Birdie!

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By Louise, May 25, 2007 at 2:00 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Aside from the fact that the shit from heaven was labeled a good sign by the White House (What does that mean? They LIKE getting shit on?) I find the quiet, comfortable way Mr. Bush simply wiped it off with his bare hand a bit telling.

Maybe they actually are trying to clean up their act!

Uh ... hmm ... naw.

More likely they’re just getting use to wading in it.

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By PoopOnBush, May 25, 2007 at 1:25 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

If only I could fly. Heck, lets get a flock of us!

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By pegasus, May 25, 2007 at 1:13 pm Link to this comment

One can always hope for bird flu.

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By C Quil, May 25, 2007 at 10:41 am Link to this comment

And the Lord said, “Behold, by beloved George, I have send my messenger unto you with a comment on your speech. Please forgive him. He’s new and was never very good at target practice. He’ll be better next time.”

re Osama Bird Laden - good one!

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By carlito paquito, May 25, 2007 at 9:20 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

shit happens, I wouldn’t read into that too much, what’s far more interesting and tell telling to his bad acting, was how he pretended like it was a piece of lint. Now that was more priceless! So commmitted an actor, not a good one, he kept that hot, slimy bird poop on his right hand for god know how long, and who’s hand did he shake first after leaving the podium? where are the good cameramen when you need one? that would have been a priceless clip.

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By Antoinette, May 25, 2007 at 9:19 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Even the little Birdie knows that
Bush is full of crap.

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By jatihoon, May 25, 2007 at 8:31 am Link to this comment

When bird shit, people spit, it is time to “QUIT”

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By Theresa, May 25, 2007 at 8:22 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

I’d POOP on ‘em too if I had the chance !!!

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By anonymous, May 25, 2007 at 8:03 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Bush’s first reaction was to brush it away and hide the fact that it happened.  He stuck his finger in it.  I’m surprised he didn’t taste it.  Maybe if he’d have left it alone, it would’ve caught fire.

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By QuyTran, May 25, 2007 at 6:03 am Link to this comment

It was not a good sign as The White House spokesperson claimed. Just trust me !

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By Robert LaRue, May 25, 2007 at 5:48 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

There is no cranial area to hit.

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By Thel, May 24, 2007 at 11:07 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Stephen Jr. reports, “Mission Accomplished!” :::applause::: (-:

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By Gabir, May 24, 2007 at 10:06 pm Link to this comment

It is a huge disappointment that this “attack” on Public Enemy #666 wasn’t more in the violent nature of Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds . What a comical ending for “The Decider Guy” to be shredded to death by a huge flock of black Ravens - and tragically , Big Game Dick forgets to bring his shotgun , thus he is unable to shoot Mr. Bush in the face ,to mercifully end his suffering .

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By socalcde, May 24, 2007 at 9:56 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

I’ve spent this day trying not to think about the fact that our democratic leaders allowed this war bill to go forward, because it is so depressing.  So this little tidbit was a welcome site,  I’ll take anything.

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By DMcD, May 24, 2007 at 9:03 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

IF ONLY ELEPHANTS COULD FLY !!!!!!!

Quote of the day.

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By mark, May 24, 2007 at 7:14 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Fox is reporting that un-named WH officials are claiming the bird has definite links to al qaeda, possibly as high as third in command in the DC delta.

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By joe 2, May 24, 2007 at 6:57 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

This is clearly a sneaky attack by Osama Bird Laden.

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By rage, May 24, 2007 at 6:07 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

LOLOL!

Heaven has spoken!

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By guntotin ganglion, May 24, 2007 at 6:01 pm Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

The Decider Guy was quoted as saying, “They poop on us ‘cause they hate our freedom!” He then announced the next phase in the Global War on Terror, by declaring all birds as terrorists. We’ll now be invading an as yet to be named country to take the fight to the bird terrorists, rather than fight them here! No one is safe until the bird jihadists are destroyed! And remember, if we don’t kill em all, they’ll follow us home and poop on our kids, pets and lawns! God Bless America, and make sure to have a flag on your lapel at all times…cause birds are afraid of them shiney things!

Dick Cheney later issued a statement that he’s doing his bit, as long as the birds are released into “the wild” directly in front of his shotgun.

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