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Arts and Culture

‘Get Rich Cheating,’ Part 2

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Posted on Jun 10, 2009
Harper Paperbacks

Jeff Kreisler

(Page 3)

Counterattack
  If you’ve got a bad image—and by now you should deserve one—counter it with aggressive public relations (beyond just taking a picture of some cancer kids playing with kittens).
  Timing counts. Pepsi hired an Indian CEO when it was facing public relations nightmares in her home country. Walmart, in the midst of the nation’s largest sex discrimination suit, set up a $25 million fund to support women-owned businesses.
  Walmart is a great example. They’ve got a political consulting group to counter their bad image. Civil Rights leader Andrew Young was the public face for a while, which prompted MLK Jr. and Rosa Parks to turn underground 360s. Rumor has it that the company’s first move will be to jump around on Oprah’s couch, telling everyone how much it loves fair labor standards. Next, an attack ad by Swift Mobile Home Veterans for Truth: “Anti-Walmart activists helped fund bin Laden.” Then they’ll announce that rival Kmart has yellowcake uranium and attack JCPenney.

 

book cover

 

Get Rich Cheating

 

By Jeff Kreisler

 

Harper Paperbacks, 336 pages

 

Buy the book

  That’s not entirely true, but you believed it for a minute, right? That’s the beauty of good PR. If Walmart can have a PR campaign, you’d better have one too.

Distract and Destroy
  Are people catching on to your schemes, seeking information, asking questions about your activities, wondering where you got those dead bodies? Well, as the good PR man knows, if something goes wrong, change the subject. Politicians do it all the time. Think anyone really cares about gay marriage, abortion, flag-burning, or the spotted owl? No, but these issues shift focus away from rampant corruption and ineffective leadership. In business, look to Sony BMG who, when rocked by a payola scandal, simply arrested a bunch of thirteen-year-olds for downloading music.
  This is the public we’re talking about. They’ve got the attention span of a gnat on Red Bull. You get in trouble, show ’em something that sparkles. Here are some surefire distractions to save your behind:
    • Adopt a peculiar physical attribute and news reports will waste words and space on it. The guy with the hook hand, limp, and horns did, um ... he’s got a hook hand, limp, and horns!
    • If you’re a woman, even better. Every report will focus on your clothes first, accessories second, hair and makeup third, and evil misdeeds in a footnote3.
    • “Sure, there’s $3 billion unaccounted for, but 24 jumped the shark, and can you believe (young person) got knocked off American Idol?

Read Chapter 20

View the Infomercial

FOOTNOTES:
1. James B. Stewart, “The Birthday Party,” The New Yorker, February 11, 2008.

2. McClellan was later on the receiving end of the White House spin machine. He did dish it; he should be able to take it.

3. If there’s room for it, White Oprah.

1   2   3

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By rockinrobin, June 12, 2009 at 9:34 am Link to this comment
(Unregistered commenter)

Shatter the image of our forefathers dream of a Gov of the people, by the people, FOR the people; that has NOT been the way this nation has been run for a VERY long time; PUT IN the TRUTH: which is a ONE party system, who’s politicians got BRIBED a long time ago who said hey hey hey let’s do it THIS way instead (by the very folks who owned the large plantations) and they claim “exploitation” which is the targeting and harming for personal gain & profit is the “way” any Gov runs which is a CRIME. The PEOPLE are the TARGET. Politicians simply means ONE THING FOLKS: PUBLICALLY saying what the PEOPLE will “accept” or THINK is true while doing whatever they choose; ENTER a JUDICIAL system who goes RIGHT ALONG with it; including CALLING the POLITICAL SYSTEM OF CRIME to find out “how they want to rule”; the “we are a force for good” was FABRICATED from GUNSMOKE. Every AGENCY is set up as a MOVIE SETTING to MISLEAD and DECEIVE the PUBLIC; they went to CHINA whom they have worked well with for years & told them to set up a Congress; LISTEN to the PUBLIC: PRETEND that what they have to say & putting laws on the books THE PEOPLE would be happy THINKING the laws were there; DON"T FOLLOW THEM: do whatever you want whenever you want however you want & never be brought to justice; have ALL THE MONEY you want; unlimited; FORCE the PEOPLE to pay & pay & pay; THIS is DEMOCRACY. Other nations like Austrailia whom they have bribed the Gov there to “do it their way” want to FEED politicians to the HUNGRY whom they have STARVED to death by weaponing up folks like Saddam Hussain in THEIR OWN IMAGE: and told them NOT to let the PEOPLE have FOOD til they PAY ENOUGH MONEY FOR IT. And sadly, they will NEVER have enough.
With the TECHNOLOGY today (MINUS the CHEMICALS) there is no need for ANY to be hungry. But they delight in cruelty & take joy in torture. And have THINK TANKS at UNIVERSITYS to find out NEW ways to HARM; claiming of course, it is for “population” control.
WHY are the PEOPLE putting up with a GOV who STATES that it is CRIMINALLY RUN? Or LAWMAKERS who BREAK laws? Or JUDGES who are more criminal than any appearing before them?

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RAE's avatar

By RAE, June 12, 2009 at 6:58 am Link to this comment

Not much of a comment but perhaps worth saying…

In today’s business/economic climate there is NO WAY that I can imagine to get financially rich UNLESS YOU CHEAT SOMEBODY even if that’s just by squeezing another 25 cents profit on each widget by applying one coat of paint instead of two.

The automotive industry is one of the best examples of collective cheating. Every single part of an American built automobile is DELIBERATELY DESIGNED to fail/wear out at a pre-determined rate. This is to ensure a steady after-the-sale source of income for all the supporting industries… parts, repair, etc.

My father told me just before I bought my first automobile at age 16 that the LEAST EXPENSIVE CAR TO OWN is a ROLLS ROYCE. You only need ONE in a lifetime instead of 15 Fords. Far less expensive… and a FAR BETTER RIDE for your entire life.

“Detroit” could likewise certainly build better machines (not to Rolls Royce standards, but “better”) but then they couldn’t cheat you out of thousands of dollars of replacement parts & repairs that fail as designed. All the emphasis in the sales pitches is on bells and whistles while nobody thinks to ask about the quality of the wheel bearings or water pump or steering assembly… you know, the IMPORTANT stuff.

Playing by the rules is for losers… any professional sports personality will tell you that “off the record.” The key to great success is to CHEAT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE and get caught at it as little as possible.

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